Tag: Growth

Is it me or do you also feel pressure to be successful or achieve a certain amount of things before you reach a particular age? Sometimes I feel like I am running and I really do not know why.

With social media and the constant comparison bubble that a lot of people live in, it seems that more and more people are running to ‘secure the bag.’ There is nothing wrong with having dreams, goals and aspirations but I think that if we are constantly running instead of striding then the following might happen:

• We may miss blessings and/or opportunities
• We may run and stumble in to problems that we did not plan/prepare for
• We may not understand or even miss important lessons because we did not take time to enjoy the journey

I think that to truly be successful and achieve the goals that you have set for yourself, you need to understand that it will take time and it may not always happen as fast as you want it to. Hard-work, planning and consistency are just some of the main ingredients that are needed. These factors take time to build, develop and nurture. So take time.

If you are running make sure that you are not doing it for the benefit of others. As I wrote last week we are all in individual lanes and should avoid comparison at all costs. Just because your neighbour may be running does not mean that you should join them. Be great, but be great at your own standards.

(this is how a lot of people live their lives, running to compete against others when they should be focusing on themselves)

As a person who has so many ideas and wants to achieve so much I thought I could do a lot of things all at once. But after long reflection (including speaking to a range of people) I realised that I did not want to be a ‘jack of all trades and a master of none.’ I want to be able to position myself as an expert in one (or maybe two) particular fields. I know that this will take a lot of time, effort, dedication, consistency and much more. But I am ready for the journey. I am no longer prepared to run because I was in a hurry. I don’t want to run into hurdles when I could stride (being prepared) in to them.

I know that we can all stride, take time and still be great.

As I believe and repeat to myself everyday: preparation (+self-belief) + opportunity = success

So this year are you running or are you striding?

Theodore Roosevelt once said that ‘comparison is the thief of joy’ and I really think he hit the nail on the head with this one.

Comparison, according to our dear friend google, is described as ‘a consideration or estimate of the similarities or dissimilarities between two things or people.’ Essentially meaning to compare how similar or how different you are to others.

One of the problems with the information and social media age that we currently live in is that, it is extremely difficult to avoid comparison. Even if we don’t want to know what others are up to we will somehow find out. It’s always in our face.

So we get stuck in this trap of comparing ourselves to others especially when we see them doing things that we wanted to do or could have done but fear and/or a lack of confidence stopped us.

Over-indulgence in comparison can lead us to create imaginary benchmarks in our heads where we measure our own successes and shortcomings against those around us and even worse those in popular culture. Before you know it you are competing with people you don’t even know!

But do you know how crazy it is to compare yourself to people who most likely had a different starting point to you?

See once you begin comparing yourself to others and letting those thoughts manifest in your mind and heart, you begin to feel frustrated and discontent with life causing yourself unnecessary torment. Comparison robs us of precious time. The same time and energy that you could have invested in yourself and your goals.

Although comparison can be positive especially if it brings on a desire to achieve and further develop yourself. Just as a business analyses the external environment to spot opportunities in the market that aid in development and innovation, you may decide to do the same with your own external environment.

So how do we avoid ‘negative’ comparison? Below are my top 5 tips

1. Focus on yourself – not as simple as it sounds, I know. But it is so important to focus on your own journey and remember that you are running in your own lane and not competing against others
2. Remind yourself of your achievements and why you are remarkable (because we all are!). Whether you prefer to speak positive affirmations out loud or stick post-it notes around your bedroom, you have to be your own biggest cheerleader!
3. Develop an attitude of gratitude. Try a gratitude jar – where you write things you are grateful/thankful for on a small piece of paper and store it away in this jar (on a daily basis)
4. Find inspiration through comparison e.g. if she/he can do it, then so can I!
5. Learn to be content with your yourself, your progress, your journey and the unknown

Remember that you are your own worst enemy and the only thing stopping you from being the best version of yourself is yourself.

So will you let comparison steal your joy, your strengths and your success or will you reclaim what’s yours?

I wanted to share with you all 23 things that I have learnt during my 23 years of life through past and current experiences. Enjoy.

1. Every individual has a God given purpose and it is up to us to discover our purpose and use all of our resources to fulfil it

2. Embrace your strengths and turn your weaknesses in to lessons

3. It is important to be who you are unapologetically and do not allow others to make you feel that you need to be less of who you are (especially because it suits them)

4. We should never stop learning – as Napoleon Hill said “the person who stops studying merely because he has finished school is forever hopelessly doomed to mediocrity”

5. Work smart and work hard

6. Failure is nothing more than the lessons that we use to propel ourselves to the next level of growth

7. Fear is false evidence appearing real

8. Use the ammunition of “fear” and “failure” to achieve your dreams

9. Preparation + opportunity = success

10. Have ambitious (not mediocre) goals and smash them

11. Make time for yourself and know that it is ok be selfish with your time when it comes to achieving your goals

12. Have specialised, rather than generalised, knowledge in your field

13. We do not need fair-weather friends

14. Expand your network and surround yourself with likeminded people

15. Give because you can not because you want something in return

16. Be of service to others and provide value

17. Have an understanding of the economical and political climate of the country that you reside in so you can navigate yourself effectively

18. Healthy and prosperous finances are only possible with smart money moves

19. Make better decisions when it comes to your health and fitness – you’ll live longer 🙂

20. Only you can decide to be happy, nobody else controls your happiness

21. There is power in declaring things out loud and truly believing that they will come to pass

22. Prayer is everything

23. “Be the change you wish to see in the world” – Mahatma Gandhi

I hope that sharing this has made you reflect on some of the most important things that you have learnt throughout your life. Remember that every lesson learnt provides an opportunity to be a better person – as Dan Lok said “hell on earth is meeting the man or woman you could have been.” – find the link to his tedx talk here